Oh man, oh man, oh man.
It's rough being a musician most of the time. Sure, it's brilliant fun to make music with some of your best friends and create a world out of the nothingness that is often every day life. I feel like without music, I would just be another being occupying space. Music gives me a place and a purpose for my heart. And it's not easy- to quote John Ralston, "No one said it was easy." But day after day (by day by day by day...), musicians everywhere have the same struggle that I do: to find where we can feel loved and appreciated for our exhibitionistic narcissism and catharsis. We just want to be loved, really.
That brings me to some sad but all-too-true revelations of late. These things are bound to happen, but a lot has been changing in my life post-college. Basically, both Fick and The Minks are breaking up. Here's an idea of the reasoning behind Fick.
"Hey guys, today I've decided to end Fick. It may seem sudden, but for a while, I've been reflecting on this past year's lack of progress, and I feel it's time to move on before investing any more time. To this day, I've continued to entirely devote myself to this band, but with the lack of progress, no fan base, and no other measurable amount of success, I can no longer justify my efforts. It's not an easy decision, and I know I'll have my regrets, but it's the best decision, at least for myself. But I'm looking forward to hopefully ending on a positive note at the next show. It's been a real pleasure, and I wish you all the best in your future musical endeavors. - Kyle"
One shiny, dysfunctional group of misanthropes.
That's a hard email to read. I don't really understand the idea of us not having fans since progressive metal is a rough genre to break into, not to mention when a band is based out of Gainesville. It's also odd to me because there was much discussion about my involvement with the band after graduating. Though it's depressing for me to admit, I saw this coming. Fick has been an amazing group to be a part of, though there were some seriously trying moments in our band's history. And Kyle's right- it's pretty annoying playing shows that no one comes to, and putting out CDs that no one ever buys. But I see music through rose-coloured glasses; I make music for myself, not for approval from others.
But really, I get it. That's just my sadness monster speaking. And no one wants to keep hearing a sadness monster ramble on and on about memories and death and life and bitterness. Self-indulgence! Hurrah!
Anyway, I thought I would take this opportunity* to relive some of my favourite moments with my bandies since after this Saturday, we won't be "Fick" anymore, though we will still be palsie walsies.
(* See the above disclaimer if you're not interested in feeling all mushy about metal dudes)
I love them all very much, and wish nothing more than awesome musical endeavours in the future. Just remember- FICK created the genre "butt rock". Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
Fine Young Poet : Em
an artist who chooses to starve